


Robbie's New Home

by shoelace_and_friends



Category: LazyTown
Genre: Claustrophilia, Gen, a really silly tumblr prompt, crackfic, hey kids...want some crack?, robbie lives in the trash, this is the result of a tumblr prompt, where he belongs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-25
Updated: 2017-04-25
Packaged: 2018-10-23 19:52:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10726077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shoelace_and_friends/pseuds/shoelace_and_friends
Summary: A riveting tale where one villain's plans spoil another villain's pleasure.





	Robbie's New Home

It can’t easily be explained. Was it a hobby? An _addiction?_ Either way, Robbie has accepted it as a part of who he is. He likes hanging out in small, tight spaces. That’s just who he is. He wasn’t sure what else to call it, so he has started to refer to himself as something of a “reverse-claustrophobe”. 

It all started with the mailbox. _Nobody_ suspects the mailbox. The mailbox is what started it all. It was just a mere _disguise_ at first, but oh, did the mailbox _quickly_ become a favorite. He can’t articulate _WHY_ , …but being surrounded by all four sides of its small metal interior felt… _deliciously cozy_ to him. Robbie would find himself sitting in the mailbox more and more often, even when he wasn’t scheming. It was just so _private_ and _safe_  in there and…being in such a small space gave him a warm chill…as oxymoronic as it may sound.  

He eventually began to take refuge in other small spaces. Sometimes, he would stand in one of his disguise tubes, acting as a living, breathing mannequin for _hours_ at a time. Or he would sneak into the elementary school…and hang out in the janitor’s closet. He always liked it in there, all nice and snuggled up against a couple mops, with barely enough space to turn around. 

There was _one_ memory however, that he held dear and close to his heart, and that was the time where he got sucked into Pretzel’s computer, and was dragged and dropped into a virtual trash can. Oh, the _euphoria_ he felt while being stuck in its digital confines! Oh, what he would _DO_ to relive such an experience!   
  
Maybe…he _can._  

He spotted the orange trash can sitting next to the playground bench, and a grin spread wide across his face. Ohohoho _boy_ , he could feel his back pressed against its cold metal interior _already!_  The villain rubbed his hands in anticipation and without further ado, he dashed over to the trash can, opened the lid, and climbed right inside, shutting himself in.   
  
…It was just as nice in the trash as he had imagined- no, it was _NICER_ than he had imagined. _MUCH_ nicer. Yes, it really _was_ quite nice in here. He thinks that he will make the trash can his home now. That’s right, Robbie _LIVES_ in here now. 

Sighing contently, the villain closed his eyes, falling into a deep sleep.   
  
*******  
  
Cucumber.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
**“AUUUUGH!”** Robbie’s eyes shot open, upon a _VERY_ rude awakening.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
**“OW!** _Ouch!_ **What the fuck?!”** He held up his arms, trying to shield himself, but they just kept coming. _SOMEONE_ was dropping vegetables into the trash, and Robbie was being assaulted by them.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
Cucumber.   
  
Cucumber. 

There were just _so MANY._ They kept coming. He could no longer see the light.   
  
_“Who the hell_ is dumping all this disgusting _SPORTSCANDY_ into my home?!”   
  
Just then, he heard a maniacal laugh, and that alone answered all of his questions.   


“Hahaha! with all the fruits and vegetables gone, Lazytown has _NO CHOICE_ but to buy my canned food!” 

He heard the metal lid shut over him, and once it did, Robbie held his breath, annoyed. _“Goddammit,_ Glanni.” 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  
…Cucumber. 


End file.
